Pick up The Hitcher? Carry on driving.

This blog is becoming a bit film-heavy, isn’t it? Sorry about that but I watch a lot of films. I promise I’ll be doing a wider variety of stuff soon because I just agreed to review some other, more interesting activities for a newspaper group so that’ll be coming up soon. Usually I try and write about a variety of things but, well, this bit is about another film, I’m afraid. Actually I was also going to do a review of Napolean Dynamite which I also watched last night but I couldn’t think of a single negative thing to say about that one so I decided to go with The Hitcher (remake) instead. I can think of plenty of negative things to say about that. You see the photo above this? That’s the best part of the film. Mmmm.

OK then; negative stuff first… the story is ludicrous and would insult the intelligence of an amoeba who was also a part-time beautician. Furthermore, it is totally, utterly predictable; the heroine ends up battling the psycho in just her underwear for example (OK this could also be seen as a positive point!). I haven’t actually seen the original movie with Rutger Hauer but I know that it MUST have been better than this! Another thing; Sean Bean is astoundingly rubbish. It’s probably more the fault of the director than the actor but Mr Bean comes across as nothing more than a pantomime villain. He may as well grow a mustache and give it a twirl. Will these third rate English actors do ANYTHING to get to Hollywood?! All of the characters are so clichéd and stereotyped they might as well be in Coronation Street.

Now for the positives. Er…. Sophia Bush. She is overpoweringly gorgeous. Sorry, I meant to say that she’s a great actress. And she is. Both of the above. Saved the film for me. Shower scene was good. Shower scene could have been a bit longer (2 hours?) and maybe the camera angles could have been a bit…wider. Gulp. Other positives? Er… the film starts off pretty good and there are moments of genuine suspense. Also, the photography of the desert landscape is absolutely beautiful. Which reminds me… Sophia Bush…

Basically this film is incredibly, overwhelmingly, Oscar-winningly, breathtakingly….. rubbish. It was supposed to be scary but the most scary thing about it is that Sean Bean may end up back in England making another 17 series of Sharpe. Be afraid, be very afraid.

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One thought on “Pick up The Hitcher? Carry on driving.

  1. I have seen the 1980s version and yes, it is a hundred times better than this is from your description. And I’ve seen the original from the 1950s too. For its time it would have been a good thriller – a little dated now. But the Hauer version is definitely worth tracking down.
    Sorry to hear Sean Bean is so crap in it. He made a great doctorvillain in The Island.

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